Skin & Bones

Fresh beginning,Same issues, New me.
  • Ask Me
  • So i went out the other night and i kind of fancy my mate, lad in my classes, and we get on so well, same music taste everything, so the night out was going great, he doesn’t know i like him (liked) and neither does anyone else. At one point he has his arm around me resting on my shoulder and my head is leaning on his, not in a weird way, like all our mates were there, we’re all good mates so it wasn’t like “oh god what are they doing” anyway. And i had had my hoodie zipped up all night as I was concious of my plunging neckline, and the guy I like was like ‘____ you look wow, just take that off, it looks lovely’

      Later on, we’re all dancing and my mate, who dissapeared earlier, reappears, she always pulls, been sleeping with a lot of guys lately, woo power to her ! and she is really good looking and really sexy, and i notice the lad i like eyeing her up (who wouldn’t) so i try and set her up with another one of my guy mates, equally as hot if not more so, but he’s too shy. So my OTHER mate (a girl this time) whispers to the lad i like something along the lines of “go hit on ____ ” so he does, he hits on the slim, attractive sexy girl, they go for a drink and mysteriously dissapear.

    I had been having such a good night prior to this. I just felt deflated then and I wanted to go home.

    Of COURSE he would choose her over me, I just thought he might like my personality more, and maybe find me attractive as we get on so well. But no he went home with her, and it’s not like its just any girl, it’s my friend (who didn’t know btw so i’m not upset at her, i know it’s all me) 

    So when i got home i cut into my fat thighs and my fat stomach so many times, they sting so much still, and i’m going abroad soon with my mates, nothing shorter than knee length for me…

    this-is-the-real-story:

    the cuts on my leg hurt so fucking bad.

    but I’m not going to lie…

    I get a sick satisfaction every time something bumps into them and makes them burn again

    So i didn’t post about my lapse last week, i’d had one not long before it (upper thighs) and i’m beginning to get worried this is going to become a full time thing again, whereas at the moment it’s only when i’m really upset or angry and it doesn’t seem to hurt to do. I’m so conscious about these ones i didn’t even think of doing it somewhere where no-one would see. These are the kind that will scar for a while but will eventually fade (6 months + :/) I’m lucky in the fact  that my scars don’t stay, as you can see from the rest of my arm. I’m going to try not to do this again. But i cannot make any promises. 

    So i didn’t post about my lapse last week, i’d had one not long before it (upper thighs) and i’m beginning to get worried this is going to become a full time thing again, whereas at the moment it’s only when i’m really upset or angry and it doesn’t seem to hurt to do. I’m so conscious about these ones i didn’t even think of doing it somewhere where no-one would see. These are the kind that will scar for a while but will eventually fade (6 months + :/) I’m lucky in the fact  that my scars don’t stay, as you can see from the rest of my arm. I’m going to try not to do this again. But i cannot make any promises. 

    I lapsed again, got some nice deep cuts on my wrist, good one. 

    bleeding-wrist-lovely-sins:

justtrying-tobe-goodenough:

howivechanged:

loverofludlow:

just-a-lonely-teenager:

i-havent-forgot:

thatsbleak:

im-just-bl0wing-sm0ke:

oh-my-thighs-bleed:

i-dont-understand-why:


Attention seeker.
Selfish.
Antisocial.
Rude.

Pathetic.
Alone.
Boring.
Stupid.

Ugly.
Annoying.
Fat.

worthless .

stupid
drop out wanna be
drug addict
ungratful
pathetic
rude
disgusting

rude
alone 
attention seeker
mean

RudeThoughtless Bitch UntidyLazyUselessPigDIGUSTING

Fuck up WhoreNot good enoughNeverFuckingEnough

reblogging AGAIN to change the source back.

I never did make them proud in the first place.

SelfishCruelLazyShallowdrop out

Fat
Chubby
no boyfriend ?

    bleeding-wrist-lovely-sins:

    justtrying-tobe-goodenough:

    howivechanged:

    loverofludlow:

    just-a-lonely-teenager:

    i-havent-forgot:

    thatsbleak:

    im-just-bl0wing-sm0ke:

    oh-my-thighs-bleed:

    i-dont-understand-why:

    Attention seeker.

    Selfish.

    Antisocial.

    Rude.

    Pathetic.

    Alone.

    Boring.

    Stupid.

    Ugly.

    Annoying.

    Fat.

    worthless .

    stupid

    drop out wanna be

    drug addict

    ungratful

    pathetic

    rude

    disgusting

    rude

    alone 

    attention seeker

    mean

    Rude
    Thoughtless
    Bitch
    Untidy
    Lazy
    Useless
    Pig
    DIGUSTING

    Fuck up
    Whore
    Not good enough
    Never
    Fucking
    Enough

    reblogging AGAIN to change the source back.

    I never did make them proud in the first place.

    Selfish
    Cruel
    Lazy
    Shallow
    drop out

    Fat

    Chubby

    no boyfriend ?

    (via broken-from-memories)

    My Mum has lost 2 stone, i can’t even lose 2lbs.